A Handy Guide to The New Dating Trends And Terms
- Editor OGN Daily
- 1 hour ago
- 2 min read
Remember beige flags, icks and situationships? Well, those terms are so last year.
Modern dating has become so baffling in the digital age, says Amy Chan - a dating coach and the author of Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart - that we shouldn't be surprised buzzy new expressions keep cropping up. People are struggling to make sense of their experiences - so they're inventing new words to process them.
So, whether you are busy swiping or just interested in the latest dating lingo, here are some of the new terms the online dating world are using. That way, the next time you get "throned" by someone you were trying to "Shrek," you'll know exactly what's going on.
Throning: It's when you date someone to raise your social status. The goal for throners is to land a partner with clout, so their own image gets a boost by association.
Shrekking: This involves dating someone you’re not attracted to in the hopes that this person will treat you better in return. After all, Princess Fiona took a chance on Shrek, and that turned out great for her, right? Unfortunately, when you get Shrekked, it means the person you lowered your standards for still ended up disappointing you. As Chan puts it: "In this plotline, you're dating an ogre without the princess treatment."
Banksying: A term that derives its name from the elusive street artist Banksy, known for art that seems to pop up out of nowhere and often comes with a cryptic twist. Like a baffling Banksy art piece, Banksying in a relationship involves slowly withdrawing emotionally from your partner, without telling them that's what you're doing.
ZIP coding: This can take different forms, depending on who you ask. In the most common version, people set such a tight radius on their dating app filters that they keep themselves from meeting anyone outside their ZIP code. However, for some, ZIP coding apparently goes even further: They'll date someone exclusively while that person is in their region, but then consider themselves single when that person's outside their ZIP code.
Monkey barring: Alludes to how in dating, partners move from connection to connection, only letting go of the old one when they’ve moved onto the next. Amanda Miller, professor of sociology at the University of Indianapolis, say the behaviour isn't all that new. But the phenomena is more prevalent right now as Gen Z struggles to find connections in real life amid the era of dating apps.
"Something where you can swipe and swipe and swipe seemingly forever makes it seem there's this infinite supply of partners, and there's not," Miller said. People monkey bar because they're seeking security, she added. They are avoiding the vulnerability that comes with leaving a relationship and being alone.
Text Abbreviations You Should Know: Depending on your age (or the age group you communicate with), text abbreviations can be a bit of a minefield. Knowing the meaning of these terms will keep anyone with a phone, social media or even just web access from being constantly confused in the digital world.