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Funny Quotes About Getting Old

Fifteen amusing quotations about growing old.

Birthday cake with lots of candles

“Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.” Larry Lorenzoni

“Age is a high price to pay for maturity.” Tom Stoppard

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” Mark Twain

“Old age comes at a bad time.” San Banducci

“The idea is to die young as late as possible.” Ashley Montagu

“Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes.” Anonymous

“Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.” Chili Davis

“Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.” Truman Capote

“Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you’ve got to start young.” Theodore Roosevelt

“The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly and lie about your age.” Lucille Ball

“Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.” Will Rogers

“The older I get, the better I used to be.” Lee Trevino

“Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.” Maurice Chevalier

“You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.” Bob Hope

“I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.” Phyllis Diller


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