After dismissing quasi-Chancellor Kwarteng, Truss's newly installed Chancellor-until-next-week Jeremy Hunt has reversed the vast majority of tax cuts she recently heralded with much fanfare - and now political experts are suggesting Liz Truss has just days to finish off Britain before being ousted.
Truss is running out of time if her vision of a completely obliterated economy and country is to be achieved. Thankfully, her plans to replace sterling with 'Britcoin' now look doubtful too. That's despite the recent observation by Andrew Bailey, head of the Bank of England: “By naming sterling ‘BritCoin’ we might just be able to instill more confidence in our currency. Marketing it as a volatile online cryptocurrency which will bankrupt its investor is certainly a step up in reputation from where sterling is currently at."
“With her economic policies ripped up by Hunt, the PM has to fall back on her effortless charm and brio to complete the task at hand," said one not entirely credible Whitehall insider.
“In all likelihood Tory MPs are hours away from telling shoot-from-the-hip Liz that she's being sent to live out her political days in a Trappist monastery, so it really is now or never if she’s truly serious about crashing the pound, prompting another interest rate hike and turning London into Zimbabwe-on-Thames,” added a junior cabinet minister, who asked to remain anonymous.
Truss was scheduled to tank the British stock market again with her answers to prime ministers questions in the House of Commons earlier this week but was unable to attend after suffering a dizzy spell from her successful world attempt for most u-turns in a week. It's a new category for Guinness World Records, and Truss is expected to retain the title for quite some time. Although she's now rumoured to be considering trying for the 'most unsuccessful attempts at hiding under a desk' record, too.
“She has her doubters, but I think Liz can fit in another 18 mini-budgets and an IMF bailout before she’s kicked out of No.10; we’ll miss these uncharacteristically chaotic times once a new Tory PM is in place,” offered one expert, thankful Labour aren’t in charge. Yet.
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