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Funny Tweets From Women Last Week

Even though nowadays they should probably be called Xs, here are 10 recent chuckle-worthy tweets by women.

Two women laughing together
It's good to laugh!

@raysofberry: I’ve officially rescheduled my wedding to 2026… such a difficult decision but it’s for the best due to due my schedule and the current climate. It will also give me more time to find the person I’m marrying so I guess it works out.

@psychtwts: Studying psychology is fun until one of the disorders starts to sound a little too familiar.

@KatieDeal99: I will never forget the time that I helped interview a man for a job opening and when he was asked what he would contribute to the team he said “probably snacks”.


Pavlov: my hair is so dry

Dog: should have conditioned it

@sixfootcandy: It's okay, facial recognition. I don't recognize myself anymore either.

@aparnapkin: When I invite people to things now, I’ve started saying “some pressure!” instead of “no pressure!” because I am trying to become a woman of conviction.


Age 25: I need cute shoes for this event.

Age 45: I need cute shoes for this event that I can also wear to work and walk several miles in, don’t make me look old or like I’m trying too hard, won’t hurt my little toe or lower back, will last a minimum of 10 years and are on sale.

@glenna_opt: 3pm? Sorry that’s my time to be the most tired I’ve ever been in my life everyday.

@tenderlettuce: airport border officer asked me "do you think people are born self-interested" after I responded "going to an academic philosophy conference" to the question "where are you going."

@kryzazzy: All this time I thought I was a good person but how I react to slow walkers in front of me would really suggest that I’m absolutely not a good person.


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