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Funny One-Liner Jokes

Here's a dozen one-liners to give you chuckle.

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Adam & Eve were the first ones to ignore the Apple terms and conditions.

Two fish are in a tank. One says, ‘How do you drive this thing?’

Just got fired from my job as a set designer. I left without making a scene.

The problem isn’t that obesity runs in your family. It’s that no one runs in your family.

Don't you hate it when someone answers their own questions? I do.

Most people are shocked when they find out how bad I am as an electrician.

I spent a lot of time, money, and effort childproofing my house… But the kids still get in.

I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, but then it hit me.

What’s the difference between an outlaw and an in-law? Outlaws are wanted.

So what if I don't know what "Armageddon" means? It's not the end of the world.

My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.

I have a few jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.


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